Children's Theorem
by Jim Low
Copyright 2005

Children's Theorem?  Of course.  Doesn't everyone understand that fundamental law of nature with children?  "The shortest distance between two points is a puddle."  I learned that many years ago when my children were young.  No matter where you go, children will find a puddle.  A puddle is irresistible.  Children must go directly to a puddle.  It's a natural law of attraction, the same as positive and negative.

It wasn't until I had grandchildren, though, when I learned the Corollary to the Children's Theorem.  One day, my daughter, grandson, and I went to a shoe store.  After my daughter picked out two pairs of suitable shoes, she asked her son to pick one pair (she already knew Toddler's Law, which is "always give Toddler's a choice").  He happily picked his new shoes, then insisted on wearing them home.  The clerk asked my daughter if she's like to buy the protective spray.  She declined, as she knew she had some at home and could do the spraying then.  We leave the store.  My grandson suddenly makes a 90 degree turn to... you guessed it... a puddle.  It was then I understood the Corollary to the Children's Theorem:  "The newer the shoes, the muddier the puddle."

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